The Phaserl



by Pining 4 the Fjords, TF Metals Report:

Though I was unaware of her existence until the poor dear was recently brought to my attention, it appears that there is a severely brain-damaged lady named Nancy Grace who has (against all odds) been allowed to host her own TV show on Headline News for some time now. From what I can ascertain, it looks as though she can form moderately coherent sentences and speaks as if she at least partially understands the individual words she hurls at the camera, so she presumably would be described as “high functioning” in light of her obvious mental defects. What quickly becomes clear when watching her show, however, is that the information processing/reasoning portion of her brain has been stunned into a non-responsive state, perhaps by repeated blows or an inherited physical deformation, or possibly by a tragic accident of some kind.


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